Post by booboo on Mar 22, 2013 6:08:53 GMT -5
After lurking on these boards, for the better part of a year, I think it's time for me to start a journal, here. I read BOB last summer, on vacation. I proceeded to have 3 amazing days of eating like a normal person, followed by falling right back into my old habits of binging on a nightly basis.
A little background. I am a 34 year old woman, and I just gave birth to my 3rd child, back in December. I have struggled with binge eating, for my entire life, though it only became unmanageable, about 15 years ago. I have spent every day, of the past 15 years, trying to stop binge eating. It takes all my energy, to not binge at night. I never succeed. I binge every single night, after the kids go to sleep. I spend huge amounts of money on things like pretzels, animal crackers, chocolate rice cakes, energy bars, fat free cookies, cakes, etc. I am a sugar and white flour fiend. I am usually able to keep it together and eat a healthy amount of food, throughout the day, until 7pm. I do not restrict or diet. It seems that no matter how much or little I eat during the day, I still binge in the evening. It's a nasty habit and compulsion. I have been in OA for about 2 years, but the theory behind BOB, is so much more up my alley. I think OA is a terrific program, but it doesn't seem to give me what I need, to actually stop the behaviors.
Every day, I resolve to start anew, and every day, I find myself compulsively going to the grocery store, and buying some random junk - lately it's animal crackers, which I've been eating by the pound, every night.
Needless to say, I am disgusted by this behavior. I want to stop, so desperately. I need a place where I can be honest, and record what's going on with me.
I will keep writing. I would like to keep this commitment. I want to leave my Lower Brain (LB) alone, and detach from it. I so want this... So... here goes!
A little background. I am a 34 year old woman, and I just gave birth to my 3rd child, back in December. I have struggled with binge eating, for my entire life, though it only became unmanageable, about 15 years ago. I have spent every day, of the past 15 years, trying to stop binge eating. It takes all my energy, to not binge at night. I never succeed. I binge every single night, after the kids go to sleep. I spend huge amounts of money on things like pretzels, animal crackers, chocolate rice cakes, energy bars, fat free cookies, cakes, etc. I am a sugar and white flour fiend. I am usually able to keep it together and eat a healthy amount of food, throughout the day, until 7pm. I do not restrict or diet. It seems that no matter how much or little I eat during the day, I still binge in the evening. It's a nasty habit and compulsion. I have been in OA for about 2 years, but the theory behind BOB, is so much more up my alley. I think OA is a terrific program, but it doesn't seem to give me what I need, to actually stop the behaviors.
Every day, I resolve to start anew, and every day, I find myself compulsively going to the grocery store, and buying some random junk - lately it's animal crackers, which I've been eating by the pound, every night.
Needless to say, I am disgusted by this behavior. I want to stop, so desperately. I need a place where I can be honest, and record what's going on with me.
I will keep writing. I would like to keep this commitment. I want to leave my Lower Brain (LB) alone, and detach from it. I so want this... So... here goes!
