Post by oolala53 on May 10, 2016 15:26:19 GMT -5
I started sneak eating food long before I ever dieted, and was actually rarely able to stay on a diet for even a day! My bingeing rose and fell and rose over 38 years until I was 56. I had never read Kathryn's book but had long before I heard of her read books by Jack Trimpey and Jeffrey Schwartz, seeing the parallel between to compulsion to eat and OCD. It took some other influences but I came to a similar conclusion to K's, that it was not a matter of finding the right food (though I did stumble on a lifestyle eating plan that made a huge difference but which slightly deviates from K's recommendations), nor of being able to solve the problem at hand. I guess in a certain way it was about just being able to cope with the feelings I didn't like in the moment. They may have come from a problem or just an old pairing of food and situation, but it didn't matter. Just outlast the urge until it was time to eat. It wasn't until I did that consistently that I learned to actually respect and enjoy true hunger. I'm 62 now and my eating has evolved over the last six years. I still sometimes overeat, sometimes in a small way like I used to, but I am very pleased with my default eating and I dropped over time from the low obese range to a little below what I weighed in high school, which was in the mid-normal range. This style of eating and the resulting weight feels pretty easy to maintain and has been despite some rocky times over appetite changes as I have aged, but I haven't considered bingeing a big issue MOST of the last six years. I hope that doesn't seem untrue to the aspirations of Kathryn and the group.
Believe me, being a normal weight and feeling mostly normal about food does NOT mean life is hunky dory. Can you believe that there are other areas that have more heartache and are even harder to change? I never married, have a dwindling circle of friends, and don't like my job much, even though I have put a tremendous amount of effort into trying to solve these problems without a lot of success, but they do not drive my eating anymore, to the point that it just sounds ludicrous for me to say, "I ate that because I was upset, or worried, or angry, etc." Nowadays, when I hear someone say that, I think to myself, "What's that got to do with it?" I know they are still caught in believing the urges are stronger than they are. I remember what it was like, and stay quiet, unless they ask. Stress cannot make me eat. It can only make me WANT to eat, and that is not the same thing at all.
I did not have CLOSE to overnight success, but I never gave up thinking that I could eventually eat in a sane way, and I think I do. I think Kathryn's work can make a huge difference for a lot of compulsive over eaters while they experiment with an eating routine that supports them throughout life, if they do the work. They may eventually be eating relatively intuitively (though in reality NO slim cultures in the world eat that way), but even that is not necessary to have a great relationship with food. Then you do your best with the rest of your life! You can't ask for much more than that.
Believe me, being a normal weight and feeling mostly normal about food does NOT mean life is hunky dory. Can you believe that there are other areas that have more heartache and are even harder to change? I never married, have a dwindling circle of friends, and don't like my job much, even though I have put a tremendous amount of effort into trying to solve these problems without a lot of success, but they do not drive my eating anymore, to the point that it just sounds ludicrous for me to say, "I ate that because I was upset, or worried, or angry, etc." Nowadays, when I hear someone say that, I think to myself, "What's that got to do with it?" I know they are still caught in believing the urges are stronger than they are. I remember what it was like, and stay quiet, unless they ask. Stress cannot make me eat. It can only make me WANT to eat, and that is not the same thing at all.
I did not have CLOSE to overnight success, but I never gave up thinking that I could eventually eat in a sane way, and I think I do. I think Kathryn's work can make a huge difference for a lot of compulsive over eaters while they experiment with an eating routine that supports them throughout life, if they do the work. They may eventually be eating relatively intuitively (though in reality NO slim cultures in the world eat that way), but even that is not necessary to have a great relationship with food. Then you do your best with the rest of your life! You can't ask for much more than that.
